Solar armageddon? Look on the bright side

Have you heard? NASA predicts a huge solar storm in 2013 that could blanket Earth in a blood-red aurora. Well, here at Carsonmania we say: look on the bright side. (Get it?... solar…bright?)  
Once those solar flares really start flaring:
You’ll get a great suntan just by going outdoors for 10 minutes.
Home heating costs will lower dramatically, especially if your roof melts away.
New options open up for winter vacation when Fargo is just as warm as Phoenix.
You won’t have to mow the lawn anymore. Rake the ash, maybe. But cut the grass? No.
Sure, the electrical grid would be devastated, but this just might be God’s way of wiping out telemarketers.

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