Tired of articles like “10 things to ask yourself before you die,” which simply rehash the old “stop and smell the roses” theme? Here’s a more practical list: eight things to ask yourself after you die.
- WTF??!!!
- Where am I? Feels hot. Not a good sign.
- Did I ever mail that check for my life insurance premium?
- How’s the cellphone coverage here? What does “ultra-extended” mean?
- How long before they discover my old stack of Penthouse magazines?
- Will they remember my request to play “Free Bird” at the funeral?
- Why didn’t I eat more chocolate donuts when I had the chance?
- Did I leave the iron turned on?
