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 Photo courtesy of Martin Vorel, LibreShot.com Let’s say your kids fell in love with goats at the petting zoo. Ha! Fifteen minutes at the petting zoo proves nothing: your children will lose interest two minutes after you bring a goat home to your back yard or hobby farm.
But don’t give up on goats just yet. There are several great reasons for owning them. (1) Goats have really weird eyes that can hypnotize people into doing their will. No wonder your hard-core survivalist neighbors believe goats are the spawn of Satan. If you keep goats, those neighbors will leave you alone. (2) Goats are highly intelligent, although you might not guess it as they munch on wire, your shirt-tail, and the roof of the nice shelter you built for them. Once they’ve finished off the shingles, they’ll jump off the roof, clear the pasture fence, and head out to scare the neighbors’ horses. With entertainment like this, who needs to pay for streaming TV service? (3) Goats are athletic. They’ve been known to climb to the tops of cars, trucks, barns, gas stations and public libraries. Some animal behaviorists believe this is a sign of condescension: the goats want to look down on everybody else. Or maybe they’re just nuts. --Excerpted from “Hobby Farming: Don’t Grow There” in Smartass Answers to Dumbass Questions, available in paperback and Kindle at Amazon. Comments are closed.
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