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 Your new puppy doesn’t give a shit about Election 2024. But he does give a shit on your expensive oriental carpet. And your cozy alpaca throw. And your imported Egyptian reed bathmat. Catching up with him (always a moment too late) takes your mind off the stupid election all day.
Once he’s emptied his colon, Pup will apply his sharp, pointy little teeth to your custom woodwork, designer shoes, vintage handbags, and couch cushions. Election-night coverage will flit by without making a dent in your conscious mind. Finally, you and Pup lie side by side, exhausted, in a deep sleep on that filthy carpet. In the morning you’ll repeat the sequence, along with chaotic feeding times… walks with Pup biting the leash and dragging you down the sidewalk… and random “zoomies” around the living room, breaking every breakable object plus some you didn’t realize were breakable, like antique chairs. And so it goes, day after day, until a month from now when someone mentions the November election, and you say, “What election?” Want more? My 99-cent Spoofbook For Pets’ Sake provides a pet-lovers’ guilty pleasure about dogs, cats, and all the other animals that own us. Click here to see it at Amazon. Comments are closed.
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