CrossFit Typical workouts involve carrying an engine block for six miles, deadlifting a dead horse, jumping barefoot off a cell tower, and running from Chicago to Duluth. Many CrossFit “boxes” (gyms) offer membership packages with priority admission to the nearest intensive care unit.
Hot yoga Lolling around a gym in jungle-strength heat and humidity…striking poses…breathing through your mouth to avoid the stink of sweat…none of this is new. But now, instead of earning a “C” in junior-high Phy Ed, you’re paying $100 a pop.
Zumba A typical Zumba class consists of 77% hard-core dancers showing off new Lululemon outfits, 5% chubby women doing half the moves at one-quarter intensity and wondering why they aren’t losing weight, and 2% nerdy guys hoping they’ll get lucky. (Total = less than 100% because many beginners drop out with ruptured eardrums once the music starts.)
Honorable mention: Pole dancing Earlier this decade, experts praised erotic pole dancing as a great way to strengthen muscles and build endurance. We now know that these experts were married guys who frequently visit strip clubs.