“We needed to counteract all the bad PR from Oscar Pistorius, Lance Armstrong and Suzy Favor Hamilton,” a Nike spokesman said. “Benedict’s athletic prowess is not widely known, but once we launch the ad campaign, many people will be impressed.
“Besides, back in the day, he stirred up lots of interest with his fancy red shoes. That certainly fits our brand paradigm.”
Benedict occasionally plays bocce ball to relax after a long day of papal duties. Coincidentally, the IOC recently introduced bocce ball as an Olympic sport, along with bungee jumping, donkey basketball, mahjongg and tiddlywinks.