Are you ready for your family’s annual Easter egg hunt?
One week before Easter: Buy two dozen white organic eggs. (“Organic” = laid by free-range chickens that are given frequent colon cleansings.)
Day before Easter: Boil eggs, then cool them on wire rack. Yell at the kids a half-dozen times to come join you in the fun family activity of coloring eggs. Finally give up and color them yourself.
Night before Easter: Hide eggs throughout the house, along with some paper money; this will motivate your kids to participate in the so-uncool egg hunt. Great hiding places include: underneath sofa cushions, inside the toilet tank, next to the furnace fan, at the bottom of the aquarium, and inside the piano.
Easter morning: Encourage the kids (egg them on – ha!) to hunt for eggs and cash.
Several weeks after Easter: Notice rotten-egg odor throughout house. Hunt for undiscovered eggs. Don’t worry about undiscovered cash; there won’t be any.
I hope you weren't expecting anything profound.
If I ever need to plead insanity, this blog will provide valuable evidence.
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